I'm finally back with some updates and alot of these are so backdated that I don't even know where to start!

I'll just let the pics do most of the talking.

First up was my trip to Seoul and San Francisco with X last month! Snapped a photo of the cherry blossoms we saw on the way to the hotel. So pretty! You don't just have to go to Japan to see sakura ok?
First meal in Seoul. These are just the appetizers. I'm always happy in Seoul because I can always nibble on these whenever I'm really hungry and the food (main course) is not ready yet. My favorite is something that resembles fishcake but they didn't serve that at this particular restaurant.=/
 Went to the supermarket and bought my favorite banana milk.=) This is awesome, a must-try!
 We also had my absolute must-eat in Seoul. It's called 'Jim-dak' - not sure if that's the correct spelling but that's how we pronounce it. This eatery is in the popular Myeong Dong district. I like that the chicken is tender and boneless, the sauce is sweet yet slightly spicy and it comes with this really QQ vermicelli! Our portion costs about SGD30, but it's so huge that it's enough for 2-3 people.

Then it was off to San Francisco. Woke up really early for seafood at this really popular joint, 'Swan Oyster Depot'. I know it's strange to have seafood this early, but we wanted to avoid the long queue.
 Our crab salad. It's really fresh. We had the clam chowder, raw scallop and a few other dishes which I can't remember! Didn't take many pictures here because I wasn't feeling very well.

Then it was off to do some shopping. I always stock up on my nail products here...its SO much cheaper!


The Vitagel nail strengthener was only USD15, and I've seen it retailing at $88 here in SG. The boss of this nail/beauty supply wholesaler is really nice too, always throwing in freebies whenever I'm there. The 2 bottles of Gelish cuticle oil was FOC from him!

Bought the Josie Maran Argan Creamy Oil Cleansing Treatment from Sephora. I don't think this product is available here though. I've been reading a lot about the benefits of argan oil and there were quite a few raves about this product so I decided to give this a try. In the end I kinda gave up on using it because you have to use the muslim cloth that comes with it...found it a bit troublesome haha.

At the end of the trip my bag was a mess. *bleah* Hate packing up.



 Was glad for a chance to spend time with X because I got to share certain things I like with him and vice versa. He also accompanied me for late night shopping at Dongdaemon where he waited til almost 3am without any complaints! Thank you for your patience love.=)

Went to check out Coriander for dinner at East Coast when we were back in SG.



The escargot was highly recommended but I found it lacklustre. To be fair I prefer a stronger garlic taste so it could just be me. The chilli crab pasta was really nice, was a bit too spicy for me halfway through so I passed it on to X to finish it for me LOL. I will definitely like to come back and try their butter crab pasta next time!

I also present to you my latest craze...

Pandora bracelet from X. I cannot emphasize how much I love my bracelet. X didn't really find it pretty at first, but now he grudgingly agrees that it looks quite nice. Of course by now I've added quite a few more charms to my collection, so more on that next time. It is pricy though, since just that bracelet with 3 little charms already cost like S$300? Plus the other charms that I've added on, the total damage on my wrist is around $600 now.-_-"

That's all for today! More updates next time....Ciao^^

Sorry for the lack of updates again:/. I will be back soon with a post on my trip to Seoul with X! There won't be many pictures but I will definitely share some useful travel information so stay tuned!

Meanwhile I shall fill up this space with some random tidbits about myself...

10 things I hate about ME:

1) My lousy temper. I think everyone, including my readers know that I have a bad temper and it's not something I'm proud of. I fly off the handle easily and I say/do a lot of hurtful stuff to people around me whenever that happens. I've been trying to change, I've toned down a lot these past 2 years and I hope I can be even better. I won't ever be the docile, sweet sorta girl but I really will try to be a calmer person.

2) My love for procrastination.

3) My ugly fingernails. They're weak and brittle and break easily.

4) My eyebags. Due to my irregular hours at work I have permanent eyebags and dark eye circles. Concealer is my best friend.

5) My lack of talent in art and music. I can't even doodle. FML.

6) My safe choices in the fashion department. I envy those people who can pull off colors like bright coral, cobalt blue, neon pink and green but I'll stick to black, white and pink thank you very much.

7) My insecurities. I never ever feel that I'm good enough, especially for X. He's smart and kind and nice and he deserves better. I also worry that we don't have enough common interests, and that he may one day find me boring.

8) My terrible posture which has led to scoliosis. That means a curved spine. It's not life threatening, but it's one more imperfection and some degree of backache that I will have to live with.

9) My inability to trust. It's somewhat linked to no.7, but it's also caused by some bad experience in my past relationships with men. I wish I could learn to give my trust wholeheartedly to X but I just can't. My past experience has shaped my belief that men cannot be trusted and I need to protect myself just in case. Because people change and so do feelings.

10) My fear of bugs. I have an insane fear of bugs, big or small. Dragonflies are the worst. I freak out big time and scream like a lunatic even in public whenever I see them. Super unglam LOL.

Ok that's it. Goodbye!

Today I shall talk about my favorite hobby which is........SHOPPING!

I know I must sound like a mountain tortoise but today my sister introduced me to qoo10.com and OMG, I nearly went crazy with the amount of stuff they had for sale!

Qoo10.com was formerly known as gmarket and they've been around for ages. I might have heard of it before but never really got down to browsing through their site as I'm aware that some waiting time is involved because of shipping etc and I'm just the really impatient type! Now I realized what I've been missing all along!

Anyway I managed to get 7 items for under S$100! Here's what I bought:

1) It's skin Babyface Finish Beam in Pink

2) It's skin Babyface Petit Pact

3) It's skin Babyface Pore Powder

4) It's skin Babyface Petit Blusher in Pink


5) 2-in-1 Hair straightener/curler

6) Petitfee Gold EGF face mask


7) Petitfee Gold EGF eye and spot patch


Isn't it such a good deal? 7 items for less than 100 bucks!!! For the curious, the it's skin cosmetics cost about S$7 each, whilst the hair curler/straightener was about $22 (not inclusive of $3.80 delivery charge). I've been looking for a hair curler recently and this is so afforable and in such a pretty pink color as well. Reviews about the product were all quite positive so I think it should be a rather good buy. All in all I'm just super excited and can't wait for the products to arrive at my doorstep!

I've been in a bad mood and retail therapy is just what I need! =) So what are you waiting for? Shop to your heart's content at q0010.com now! 

Hi! Feeling kinda bored so I've decided to come fill this space with some nonsense/random updates.

Day 3 in Moscow now and my stomach is feeling much much better. Had a kaya bun and milo on my first day here, then I had 2 kaya buns and a milo the next day and today I actually ate some room service. Happy to say that I kept all my food down, though it was with much difficulty cuz my body kept fighting it. I would take a few nibbles then stop, because my body was threatening to regurgitate the food I've eaten.

However I'm all better now, so much so that I thought I could indulge in a chocolate milkshake. I was wrong. To be honest I wanted to have a milkshake because I was feeling REALLY DOWN IN THE DUMPS. I know right, like again?! 'Amanda when will you start growing up and learn to let go?' Sorry it just doesn't work that way for me. X has been very patient with me but even I can tell that his patience is being severely tested. He told me 'ok you've been maligned. It's unfair. GET OVER IT.' I was bawling my eyes out as I read his message. Don't get me wrong, it's not him being harsh or un-empathetic because he was merely pointing out the truth. That I had to learn to deal with it and not let such petty people/ insignificant things get to me and spoil my otherwise not-too-bad life. Plus it's been like almost a week now and I know I must sound like a broken record constantly harping on the same subject over and over again.

I felt horrible at that moment because I was hundreds of miles away from Singapore and I wanted nothing more than to curl myself up in X's arms and just cry myself to sleep. The comfort and warmth I was desperate for is literally unattainable and I couldn't even FaceTime with my husband because he had unwired his router due to a problem with his home PC. #FML. X is seriously concerned about my emotional state of mind now and he's aware of how affected I am over this matter. It's like a dark cloud following me everywhere and I can't shake it off. I'm letting it take over my life in a very unhealthy manner by constantly dwelling on it. I could be okay for a few hours and then suddenly the angst just takes over without warning. He even advised me to seek some counseling because I can't seem to let go. Suddenly I'm the one with a problem when it's some stupid f**king bitch who started it by writing in a false complaint about me? I know X means well, but I don't need counseling. What I need, is revenge. And don't tell me success is the best revenge, because that's not true. REVENGE IS THE BEST REVENGE.

Anyway I did some research on this and it's disheartening to know that Singapore has no legislation on workplace bullying. So meaning what? Your boss can just accuse you of some wrongdoing, wreak havoc on your life and just get away with it? I know WTF right. Dead end. I can't sue that bitch.

Let's move on from the negatively depressing to something more positive instead. Many friends, people whom I didn't even think cared, actually bothered to contact me and give me words of encouragement. It made me really touched. I'm not a warm, friendly sociable type of person by nature and I'm happy that people cared enough to show their support for me. Eternal gratitude guys, really. I'm also thankful for my great husband, because despite all the shit I'd put him through, all the lack of appreciation for everything he's done for me, he's still sticking around. I know this bitch must be so bitter because her husband probably doesn even give a shit about her, that's probably why she tries to make other people's lives miserable. I will not let you have the pleasure of succeeding muahaha!

To X - 'It seems like I'm pushing you away everytime some shit happens. But I'm not. I need you more than anything but I guess a lot of my anger got in the way. I'm sorry, I know I've made a mess of things and got you really worried about me. I've always been the immature and impulsive one, and you, you hold me down like an anchor holding down a ship. I don't even know what I'll do without you. Once again, I'm sorry and I love you.'

Neglected this space again and I apologize for getting too caught up with other things in life.

Besides marrying a great husband who's ever sweet to me despite my gigantic flaws, nothing has really gone well recently.

Work-wise, I can only say I'm sick and tired. Literally and metaphorically. Physically and mentally. People think flying is a glamorous job but it is in fact nothing of the sort. NOTHING. If you've been reading yahoo's part 1-3 stories on cabin crew, it's all true. The part about traveling getting old fast, how all you want to do is check into the hotel and sleep for 24 hours before checking out for your next tedious 8-14 hour flight. The only story I didn't quite care for was the sob story of the girl who got herself into major credit card debts due to her vanity.

Anyway the physical lethargy isn't the main reason why I want out. Not being home and spending enough time with my family isn't the issue as well. The straw that's threatening to break the camel's back? Politics. Workplace bullying. I know it exists everywhere in every company, in any line of work, but NOT LIKE THIS. Our workplace is like being in army 24/7. 101 rules to follow, drill sergeants ready to come down on you for the slightest thing, talking down to you like you're some
school kid, and basically just thriving on a reign of terror. I'm not saying everyone is like this, but when u encounter one, just ONE person who has it in for you, it's enough to make you reconsider your options outside.

I guess leaving just because of one lousy bitch who made a false allegation about me seems rash. It may seem weak as well. But judge all you want. All I can say is I've been working damn hard for the past 3 years without taking a single day of medical leave. I take pride in my job and put in 110% every single time, and I've always played by the rules. I've been bullied a few times and I get over it but this time, it's different. I'm not angry. I'm FUCKING angry. Not just at this bitch, but my anger is also directed at the system which claims to be transparent but isn't. The system which basically protects and supports the crew of a higher rank in any situation. Like they even care about fairness and the truth. It's like fighting a losing battle and getting faulted for something I didn't even do is just sickening. It really makes me sick to think that I've put in my heart and soul for this company only to get treated like I committed a capital crime. I'm not even allowed to look at the email containing the actual complaint about me. Tsk. For some reason it's too difficult to press a few buttons just to forward the email to me, and I have to go down to the office if I want a copy of the email in question.
Duh.

I'm going to be away for another 10 days, and I've been fighting a stomach flu of sorts. Having difficulty keeping any food down and my stomach is gurgling and churning away. Ugh. Needless to say I've been eating very very little these few days and it really sucks. I just feel weak all over and I can't wait to get home so that X can take care of me. I really miss him and I just want to apologize for my atrocious behavior towards him recently. This job should be the one to go, not him. I'm sorry that I've taken out my anger on him. He most certainly doesn't deserve it.

Ending off here. Hopefully I'll be back with a happier update soon.

Feeling really down right now as I'm writing this.

More than 4 years ago I was at a very low point in life. Lots of family and relationship problems, anger management issues and I had no direction. I felt very lost then and even suffered panic attacks. I'm really glad I've moved on from that really dark period but of late, it seems that I've been getting those feelings all over again. Not so much feelings of anxiety or panic, but just a lack of enthusiasm for life.

As you all may know, I'm getting married next month and to be honest, I'm not in a celebratory mood at all. Am I happy? I don't know. All I wanted to do was sign some papers and get on with life but everybody wants to have a say in all the proceedings so in the end the simplicity was lost. The dress I got is not right, the bridal shoes aren't right either. I'm not loving any of it. The dinner that we're having isn't my idea but to make my mom happy I'm going along with it. Had a bunch of arguments with X over this and God, it seems like no one really cares about what the bride wants. No one bothered about MY feelings and on numerous occasions I cried because it was so tough trying to please everybody.

I've been feeling really tired physically too and as a friend pointed out, it could be work-related stress that's sapping my energy. You know what? That's life. You have to work because there are bills to pay so suck it up. I complain a lot but I get my job done. However I cannot change the way I am physically affected. I'm lethargic and I have no energy for anything. The things I used to enjoy like yoga? No way. Just the thought of waking up to go for yoga class is torture. And my sex drive is next to zero. I know X hates the fact that I'm so open with all these personal stuff but whatever. This is my way of airing my grievances and just a form of release for me. Better than mutilating myself like what I used to do right? I feel sorry that I've been nasty to X because of all the negativity in me, I even suggested calling off the wedding because I'm not sure of anything right now.

I'm feeling spent. Like every ounce of zest, energy and life has been sucked out of me. Tomorrow when I wake up it will be another day of battle, another day of meaningless work. Goodnight.

Got inspired to share my own experience on Lasik after reading someone's blog.

I had my own Lasik procedure done about 6 months ago at Gleneagles and I must say that I have not once regretted my decision. I've got 6/6 vision now in both eyes, and that freedom of not wearing glasses or contact lens? Priceless.

Whilst X had a lot of tearing post-Lasik, I was very lucky not to have the same symptoms. I had packed a whole box of tissue with me expecting to use it up but I was actually kind of normal after the whole procedure was done. I remember sitting at the Delifrance cafe having a quick bite whilst waiting for X to come and pick me up and he was like 'how come you seem so normal?' and I replied 'I dunno!'.

My eyes did get extremely sensitive towards light for a prolonged period, seeing halos and all but overall I think my recovery was speedy. In fact I had my 'full' eye makeup on just after 5 days as I had to go back to work. But that was with the okay from my doctor k?

Cost-wise, Parkway Eye Centre is definitely costlier than most but it also depends on the type of Lasik you do. From what I gather, I had to do the most expensive procedure as I had extremely high myopia (1000 degrees/eye). Therefore I paid about $5000+, inclusive of 2 post-op checkups and some medication that was required. A third post-op checkup was needed (but you need to pay for that), but I skipped it LOL. But if you're the type that likes to play safe then just go for it.

For those of you who are feeling apprehensive and scared, please don't be! It is normal to feel a bit nervous because it is a surgery after all, but the risks are really minimal. I think body piercings are more risky haha. Pain-factor is almost zilch. You feel some pressure during certain parts of the process but that's all. After a few hours of rest and you'll be as good as new! Vision will be fuzzy (not completely clear) for the first few days, but it should all be good after that=).

That's about all I have to share on my own Lasik experience and I hope this information helps! It really is the best thing I did in this entire year.

Ok ending off this post with the obligatory camwhore shot and pictures of my new 'baby'!





My new Givenchy Antigona! I love love love the color and I've always liked structured bags! I know this is a similar color to my Prada, but I can't help it because I'm boring that way. I only like certain colors i.e. nude and black and I stick to them.

Gtg! Be back soon^^