I was slightly disappointed by the servings as I had expected bigger American appetite portions. We ordered the buffalo wings, soup of the day (mushroom), and the fettuccine to share but I was let down by the rather tasteless fettuccine. On the good side, the fettuccine came with 10 nicely grilled shrimps and their soup though a little watery in the consistency, had a nice flavor to it. The buffalo wings were good as well - the honey BBQ sauce hit the right notes without being too sweet for me.

The Maple Butter Blondie.

The dessert was yummy! I still had room for the dessert despite the fact that I was stuffed from the appetiser and the main. The only gripe I had was the slightly hard brownie which took abit of effort to cut. Otherwise this was delicious^^

I also met up with Liping 2 weeks back for a buffet lunch @ Marina Mandarin. The buffet spread was pretty scrumptious though I didn't really eat alot that day. FYI: the buffet is 1-for-1 for UOB cardholders so it comes up to only $22 per pax for a buffet with fresh oysters the size of my palm, and really BIG prawns. Good deal, esp. for oyster-lovers.

I don't really know most of her co-workers cuz this was her company's 'bonding lunch', but it was still fun to eat, drink and chit-chat, esp with Liping cuz she's been so busy with her business that we rarely meet as often as we would like. Anyway, I wish her good luck to her tuition centre business! It's not easy being an entrepreneur & I applaud her guts for abandoning her job at a bank & going for her dreams.

Last but not least, I have to have my weekly fix at TeaDot.

For the record, I've always been a coffee person for the longest time. I never fancied tea nor did I care for it but after a couple of trips to TeaDot with Liping (cuz this friend of mine doesn't drink coffee), I'm a tea convert cuz I discovered the Perfect Match Tea Latte (above). It tastes like milk tea infused with a hint of strawberry and whipped cream and the creamy combination is really good. So X & I will always go to TeaDot at least once every week now just to chill and enjoy the tea. I know it sounds boring but I just love that feeling of being with someone and not having to do anything and yet its just so comfortable. I almost feel...content and it's a good feeling.

We also have a little trip planned next month. I'm SOOoooO looking forward to it & I'm just praying that nothing happens to screw with our plans. *fingers crossed*

"Dear Mr.X,

I know its been a tough journey full of ups and downs. Despite all the 'shit', I love you too.

Yours sincerely,
Amanda S."

After hours of debate over the phone with X each and everytime, I just think I'm really dumb cuz it doesn't really matter that much who wins the argument, does it? Both of us are equally obstinate and opinionated but we only end up hurting our relationship by being stubborn. Any apologies that come after that are usually too late.

It wasn't easy for me to get back with X and it certainly hasn't been easy getting our relationship on the mend. There's been mistakes made in the past on our parts and it's taking a toll on us because we've never really completely erased the hurt/resentment/anger, we've merely suppressed them. Not very healthy, is it?

I ask X for his forgiveness and I give him mine too. I also promise not to get upset over his insensitivity because I will remind myself that it isn't intentional. I will simply let him know if he ever hurts my feelings unwittingly next time. Of course I hope that he learns not to do it again but even if he does it, I will forgive him because I know its not deliberate. People can't help it if they're stupid.

"X, if you're reading this, you know the last line is a joke right?^^"

I feel so alone and I'm so tired. Why can't I see the light in front of the tunnel & where is that hand that was gonna lead me through this darkness?

There have been many moments of self-doubt and sometimes I feel like the pieces of the puzzle just can't fit. Perhaps that hand that was supposed to hold on to me has given up already.

Maybe it's time for me to give up as well.


"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."
I think I gotta start watching my diet with all the pigging out that I do. Recently checked out 2 restaurants that were reviewed in 8 Days. Here are the pictures:

-Charly T's. I don't really think Charly T is a real person though. Located next to The Cathay cinema, the place is kinda quiet but looks abit 'atas'. I shared the whole chicken with X and was amazed that he ate more than 2 thirds of it. The chicken is tender and juicy, it really melts off the bone so it saves you the trouble of cutting through it too vigorously. As for their sides, I liked the butter garlic rice and the mac-&-cheese. *Yum*



-Ramen Santouka @ Central. This place was rated no.1 for their ramen in this week's 8 days so I had to give it a try! The Tokusen Toroniku Shio Ramen (second pic)comes with 'pork cheek' meat that's really soft but to me it was kinda pricey @ $19.50. Their noodles are pretty good, but I also recommend Miharu @ Gallery Hotel, which was ranked 3rd by 8 Days.

Ippudo Ramen has also been getting rave reviews & I've tried their pre-packaged noodles from Japan which X bought for me. What I got from cooking at home was quite tasty so I'm itching to try the ramen at their restaurant here in Mandarin Gallery. But word of the long queues has put me off for the time being. So I prefer to wait til the hype settles.









The need for space for me has been a rising issue these days. Various problems in different forms, big or small, have been cropping up and growing up now, it seems like my mental state of mind is no longer able to turn a blind eye to things that I may have previously chosen to ignore because I thought I had no choice but to do so.

But now that I'm older but perhaps none the wiser to some, I'm beginning to ponder ways of possible escape. Some people may think that avoidance doesn't solve anything, but the way I see it - having some physical distance is better than being stifled.

I grew up in an environment that was filled with uncertainty, negativity, fear and like any other kid I thought that was a normal environment. Someone used the word 'abusive' to describe my childhood years & I vehemently disagreed. But a recent incident has made me realize that I might need to re-evaluate my opinion. That perhaps physical violence is indeed a form of abuse, no matter what the trigger was or how frequent OR infrequent it may be.

It's an uphill struggle for me to control my emotions, and specifically my anger cuz I remember watching by example from a tender age that when you're angry it's normal to scream and yell, it's normal to smash things and use force. Hell it was the only way I knew how to vent my anger and I learnt by imitating since I was a kid.

It's only in recent years that I'd finally recognize my bad temper as a problem & decided that I WANT TO CHANGE. But changing a behavioral pattern that you've cultivated for 20 over years with the help of nature & nurture is like a drug addict trying to go cold turkey. It's damn difficult but I still want to do it for myself, for who I love and also because I don't want to be anything like that destructive force that dominated my whole life since young.

I AM NOT YOU.
I've just gotten one of my dreams come true...which is to have an expresso machine of my own! Technically speaking it's not really mine, cuz X bought it for himself but he decided to put it at my place since I love coffee too. 'Anyway I can always pop by to have a cup of coffee,' he said. So despite my protests, the Nespresso machine which he bought in London now sits on a table inside my kitchen~


Although setting it up was a tad more troublesome than I thought (cuz u have to filter/clean the machine with water first n stuff), I'm loving it...hahaha. No more running down to McCafe for my caffeine fix. X & I had some fun experimenting a few different brews on the machine as well.


Can I just brag that X is simply the best? Not because he showers me with gifts or wine & dines me but because he shows his affection and love in the most implicit ways I'd previously neglected to see.


There are times when I get difficult & accuse him of not understanding me when I'm the one who made myself hard to understand.


X knows me almost inside out. Give him the menu at a restuarant & he can pick out the dishes I'll like to order. Go into a boutique/online blogshop & he can tell which outfit I like. Sometimes I tell him I feel he's emotionally distant cuz he's not a vocal person (i.e. not a big fan of 'communication') but the fact that he takes note of all these details about me shows exactly how much he cares. I haven't been fair at all, have I? Yet I always say action speaks louder than words when I've been placing so much importance on the verbal part.


I've got some soul-searching to do.