Thoughts.
POSTED ON Tuesday, July 16, 2013 AT 1:46 AM \\
What I'm about to share is something rather personal.
I've had some kind of minor emotional setback recently. I've been starting to question what I'm doing and my sense of fulfillment has been more than lacking as well. All these doubts started at the back of my head, and they just kinda stayed there until my mood swings hit and I would start complaining every once too often. A recent disappointment simply opened up a can of worms.
I apologize for being so vague, because there are certain things which I can't say on this blog. I'm not allowed to.
Anyway I've been quite a pain to be around because of this and it was only until a recent dinner with my extended family that made me realize that I'm in fact, way luckier than I thought I was.
My paternal aunt was born a deaf-mute and because of circumstances back then, she wasn't given a chance at education. Due to her lack of any qualifications and also her disability, she could only do menial/labour jobs.
After dinner, I did a lot of thinking. My constant complaints about how tired I feel and how I hate my life suddenly seemed really childish and insignificant. Our parents' generation suffered and slogged so much more than I did. Take my aunt for example - she probably had to deal with all sorts of discrimination and hardship in her lifetime and yet here I am, kicking a fuss about my backaches and not getting enough sleep blah blah blah.
My dad too, has worked hard to give my siblings and I the lives that we have now. My family was pretty broke when I was a kid, we couldn't even afford diapers and my sister and I had to sleep in the living room. Then slowly, bit by bit, through my parents' hard work, things got better and better. We shifted to a bigger house, and could afford treats like Mcdonalds. My dad is still working til now and hasn't retired yet.
On the other hand, I've only been working for the past 3 years in my first full-time job and I'm already acting like I deserve some sort of long service award. Compared to my parents and my aunt who have slogged an entire lifetime, I don't think I'm in a position to complain about anything.
I know you have to work for the things you want, and that nothing in life is free. Nobody ever said that life is fair or easy, and that we need to be content with what we have. Sometimes no matter how many times I tell myself that, it's still hard to chase those blues away. It's not something that an inspirational quote can solve.
Today I have my aunt to thank for reminding me that I am indeed a very lucky girl. I have a family that is strong though sometimes dysfunctional, I have the most loving husband in the world who takes my sh*t and still sticks around and friends who would look out for me. I'll also have a place of my own next year! That's something that I really wanted and something X and I worked really hard for. We should be proud and I am truly blessed.=)
I've had some kind of minor emotional setback recently. I've been starting to question what I'm doing and my sense of fulfillment has been more than lacking as well. All these doubts started at the back of my head, and they just kinda stayed there until my mood swings hit and I would start complaining every once too often. A recent disappointment simply opened up a can of worms.
I apologize for being so vague, because there are certain things which I can't say on this blog. I'm not allowed to.
Anyway I've been quite a pain to be around because of this and it was only until a recent dinner with my extended family that made me realize that I'm in fact, way luckier than I thought I was.
My paternal aunt was born a deaf-mute and because of circumstances back then, she wasn't given a chance at education. Due to her lack of any qualifications and also her disability, she could only do menial/labour jobs.
After dinner, I did a lot of thinking. My constant complaints about how tired I feel and how I hate my life suddenly seemed really childish and insignificant. Our parents' generation suffered and slogged so much more than I did. Take my aunt for example - she probably had to deal with all sorts of discrimination and hardship in her lifetime and yet here I am, kicking a fuss about my backaches and not getting enough sleep blah blah blah.
My dad too, has worked hard to give my siblings and I the lives that we have now. My family was pretty broke when I was a kid, we couldn't even afford diapers and my sister and I had to sleep in the living room. Then slowly, bit by bit, through my parents' hard work, things got better and better. We shifted to a bigger house, and could afford treats like Mcdonalds. My dad is still working til now and hasn't retired yet.
On the other hand, I've only been working for the past 3 years in my first full-time job and I'm already acting like I deserve some sort of long service award. Compared to my parents and my aunt who have slogged an entire lifetime, I don't think I'm in a position to complain about anything.
I know you have to work for the things you want, and that nothing in life is free. Nobody ever said that life is fair or easy, and that we need to be content with what we have. Sometimes no matter how many times I tell myself that, it's still hard to chase those blues away. It's not something that an inspirational quote can solve.
Today I have my aunt to thank for reminding me that I am indeed a very lucky girl. I have a family that is strong though sometimes dysfunctional, I have the most loving husband in the world who takes my sh*t and still sticks around and friends who would look out for me. I'll also have a place of my own next year! That's something that I really wanted and something X and I worked really hard for. We should be proud and I am truly blessed.=)
